Thinking It Over
by kristy87
Summary: Will Stephen really leave the NIH? And what happens with him and Natalie? NatStephen


Dislcaimer: I do not own Natalie and Stephen :(

AN: my first try EVER on MI fics, so please be nice. And I don't have a beta reader so please ignore my mistakes or don't read the fic when it bothers you.

Summary: Will Stephen really leave the NIH? And what happens with him and Natalie?

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**Thinking It Over**

"Hey," She slowly approached him and hesitantly took a seat on the chair next to his. She didn't know if he wanted to talk, she didn't know if he even wanted her to be around.

"Hey." He replied after a while. He didn't even look up; his eyes kept staring at the table in front of him.

She waited for a moment until she broke the silence. "I heard that you wanted to quit… before all of this happened."

"I still don't know if I can continue doing this job… I…" He sighed, and then he finally turned to face her. "Nat, I'm going to lose my son if I don't change something."

She nodded softly and placed her hand on his. "I know." She almost whispered. She knew he'd quit; probably he'd even return to his wife and try to fix things with her. Just the thought of this possibility hurt her more than she thought anything ever could.

"What am I supposed to do?" He threw an asking look at her, his eyes searching for hers so that their gazes could meet.

"I, I don't know. I guess a job with more regular working hours would make it easier, but would you be happy with doing a different job?" He had taken her hands into his; she couldn't think when he was touching her, even though it was just something simple like the touch of his hands on hers.

"I didn't mean the job, or my family for that matter." He blushed slightly, not really knowing what he should do or say to make her understand that he did not only feel like he was betraying his son with continuing to work for the NIH but also feeling like betraying her with quitting his job and drawing a final stroke under everything that had happened between them. And if he would quit his job, he wouldn't be able to see her as often as before anymore. He liked her, liked her a lot, more than he should as her superior. He knew there was even a possibility for them to get together; he couldn't deny that he had fantasized about being in a relationship with her. So wasn't he even betraying himself when he'd simply leave?

She was speechless for a moment; he was not really referring to them was he? They were not even a "them" even though she'd give almost everything if it would bring them together.

When she continued to stare at him without answering his question he knew that he had to say something. If not now then it might be too late and he knew that very well. The moment wasn't perfect but it might be his last chance, depending on what he would decide to do about his job. But where was he supposed to start? What was he supposed to say? What did she want to hear? Did she want to hear anything about this topic at all? "I don't want things to end between us when I quit my job." He said softly. This wasn't exactly what described what he was feeling, but it was at least closer than anything else that had come to his mind in the last seconds.

"Things," She paused for a short while. "Things never really started between us…" God knew she wished they had.

He sighed. "I know, I… but there… Natalie we both cannot deny that there are things going on between us that… that are deeper than friendship."

"But you cannot deny either that you have a wife and a son who wants you to get back together with his mother… I…" She didn't know what to think, this could not be happening, or could it? She knew Stephen must have been thinking a lot about his life and where he wanted it to lead in the last days, but was he really sure about this? He didn't seem to be that convinced that he was doing the right thing at the moment.

"Nat I won't go back to my wife. We're separated and that is not going to change." He tried to reassure her. "We… we could take things slow. I mean how about having dinner together? You and me, away from work."

That really wasn't an offer she could deny. Stephen wouldn't ask her if he wasn't sure about it. She nodded slowly. "Okay."

A bright smile flashed over his lips. "Tonight?"

She returned his smile. "Sounds great." She wasn't sure if she should stay or leave the room now. She decided that leaving wouldn't lead to uncomfortable silence so she got up from her seat.

"Nat," he stopped her before she reached the door. "When I arrived at the hospital and… and only saw the remains of what it had used to be… I thought I had lost you. I didn't think someone in there had survived."

So that was his reason, that was why he finally wanted to take things further. It didn't really bother her, whatever it took to make him realize that she was more to him than just a colleague was fine as long as he'd just realize it. "But I'm fine." She stressed her statement with a short nod.

"Are you?" He asked her then and she could hear how concerned he was.

"I am, yes." She smiled softly. "What about you?"

He sighed and then shrugged. "I'm still trying to figure it out."

"We saw some really horrible things down there, but we can't change what happened, we were there to help and we did our best to do so. That we didn't manage to help everyone should have been obvious to us, but somehow it's always better to think that you can help everyone. Otherwise you'd give up at some point." She sat down again. "And we did save a lot of people. _You_ saved a lot of people. And not only this time… it will be a huge loss for the NIH when you leave."

He sighed. "I know. I know, Nat but what am I supposed to do?"

"I want you to stay, but it would be unfair to tell you to stay just because I want you to."

He nodded softly. "Maybe I should take some time off and see how it is to be away from the NIH."

"Sounds like a good thing. Maybe you should go on vacations together with your boy… a father and son trip. Fishing or camping or something like that."

"Will I see you when I take time off?" He asked sounding a bit insecure.

"Why don't we work out the kinks of that tonight?" She winked and now finally got off her seat and made her way to the door.

"I'll pick you up at seven." He gave her a smile. Then he watched her leave. Finally he had asked her out, he felt kind of proud of himself. He'd wanted to do that for such a long time, finally he had found the strength to do so. And the vacations thing sounded good as well. Maybe after all everything would have a happy ending.

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THE END


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